Day 158: March 26

192.5 days.

It seems I have issues. (well we knew that, it's just evidence of that). Okay, well 192.5 days is not actually halfway. It's actually one hundred and EIGHTY two point five days. I have no clue how I even read it wrong in the first place, I just did.

Wrong.

Exhale. Feel all the old air going out. Inhale. Feel the air filling you up; everywhere - your stomach, your ribs. Exhale. Get rid of the air.

Welcome to my meditation class which I would like to scrunch up into a little ball and throw out the window.

Today, we learnt to breathe. Granted, it wasn't 'normal breathing', per se, but belly breathing which my dad had already taught me to get rid of stitches when I uses to run. (lol)

I just think the irony of the 'class that's meant to make you stress less' is that's it's making me pissed off and then frustrated because I can't do anything and therefore stressed. So the non-stress class is making me stress.

To start from the beginning, I didn't want to go. I've done my fair share of muscle relaxation and clenching and unclenching, and I really didn't think it helped. My parents were rock-solid in their decision. "You have to go, it'll help you". Because apparently on things that concern me, I don't get a choice. Fun times. But then the school made it compulsory, which pisses me off even more. Okay, my parents probably would've made me go, even of it wasn't compulsory, but for the kids whose parents wouldn't have made them go... Ugh. I just don't like super super calm people. It's natural to get angry sometimes, even if it's not around people. It's normal to get frustrated when you can't do something. I just think its creepy that someone is completely calm all the time. Non. Apparently she has never taken Panadol (shit in a hole), never finished a glass of wine, never taken antibiotics (also crap) and thinks that drugs (clinical ones) are never the answer. Well lady, I'd like to see you lying in a hospital bed in a world full of pain refusing to take drugs. She has these blanket ideas that things are either good or bad, right or wrong, calming or not.

Incorrect.

Sadly, I have another 4 sessions of the crap to endure. Oh Jesus.

One hundred and fifty eight things I have to know for the various tests and assessments I'm doing in the next two days (whether it be meanings, synomyns or how to write it):
TRY AND GUESS WHAT SUBJECTS THEY'RE FROM - there's 3
1. Gridlock
2. Satisfaction
3. Reinforce
4. Irrelevant
5. Sarcastic tone
6. Enthusiastic tone
7. Drudgery
8. Humorous
9. Authoritative
10. Elation
11. Prejudice
12. Despair
13. Subjective
14. Connotations
15. Dilapidated
16. Euthanasia
17. Imbecile
18. Endorse
19. Opinion article
20. Letter to the editor
21. Editorial
22. The news paper
23. The development of the argument
24. The kick
25. What a contention is
27. Sarcasm
28. Fade
29. Dissolve
30. Wipes
31. Cut
32. Emphasises
33. Consciousness
34. Renowned
35. Convey
36. Starch
37. Prosperity
38. Descendant
39. Table on pg 52
40. Preposition
41. Condemn
42. opinion
43. Manipulation
44. Enhancing
45. Persuasive techniques
46. Generalisation
47. Patriotism
48. Perceived
49. Opinionated
50. Rhetorical Question
51. Emotive Language
52. Tone
53. Register
54. y = mx + c
55. y2-y1 / x2-x1
56. Inverse if divided
57. Minus the indices (division)
58. Add the indices (multiplication)
59. Flip the > if its minus
60. Dot forget to flip it
61. Number lines
62. Left: minus, right: plus *
63. O - not equal to
64. • equal to
65. MR SCOT SAID LSD
66. Movement
67. Region
68. Spatial change over time
69. Spatial association
70. Spatial interaction
71. Spatial distribution
72. Scale
73. Movement
74. Distance
75. Hydrosphere (water)
76. Atmosphere (air)
77. Biosphere (animals & plants)
78. Lithosphere (rocks)
79. Long shore drift
80. Annotating
81. Reflection
82. Refraction
83. Evaluation
84. Constructive
85. Destructive
86. Spit
87. Cliff
88. Headland
89. Depositional
90. Erosional
91. Sediment
92. Anomaly
93. Tone shift
94. Definitions
95. M = gradient
96. C = y int
97. Y int, x = 0
98. X int, y = 0
99. Read the question carefully
100. Input
101. Output
102. Processes
103. Wave action
104. Sea wall
105. Breakwater
106. Jetty
107. Pier
108. Limestone
109. Basalt
110. Granite
111. Title
112. BOLTSS
113. Border
114. Orientation (where North is)
115. Figuring out where North is
116. Legend
117. Source
118. Scale
119. Coloured pencils
120. Submerged sand
121. Vegetation
122. Dense
123. Sparse
125. Strong
126. Medium
127. Weak
128. Associations can be mapped
129. Arrow pointing onto map
130. Horizon line
131. Make it 3D?
132. Scattered
133. Clustered
134. Linear
134. South
135. East
136. North
137. West
138. NS, WE
139. Bludge
140. Write more
141. Use units!!
142. Wind
143. Rain
144. Shallow water
145. Major features
146. Berm
147. Back dune
148. Are the people interacting?
149. Expanding
150. Factorise
151. Can't cancel expressions
152. Relax you have plenty of time
153. Stack
154. Wave cut platform
155. Location
156. Relative (close to)
157. Absolute/Exact (address)
158. Facetious

So maybe as you guessed, or didn't: geography, English and maths.